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Friday, July 3, 2009
good evening dipsticks. currently, im am having identity crisis again.today also happens to be my "negative" day.all day, these thought were in my mind the whole day... i hate my hair. i hate the outfit that im wearing today. i hate my body shape. i look too fat. i dress too boring. im very clumsy. i look nerdy. i need to change my style. i want to change everything. subhannallah. after listing down my sorrows today....i realized that im not appreatiative of what im given. i told ibu of my problems and she told me to be grateful and consider this doubts as a blessing from God. if i become thinner, i will have the confidence to wear tighter clothes, singlets and shorts and that will be a Sin to expose myself more.To look at it a good way, God is actually saving us from His hell fire. wowww...im all religiousy.... maybe what trigger my negative thoughts was that the guys in my class are busy fantasizing random girls around campus. i hate it when im in front of them, they would praise the girl's hotness and how sexy she look. it took my moral down. as i look at the girls they fantasize, i took a glimpse of myself in the mirror. all, i look like is some average girl in tee shirt and denim jeans. nothing like the other beautiful girls. they wore shorts,singlets...they have long hair,a tanned and tonned body. they look so different from me.i feel like such a big slob next to them.my hair would look flat on the top and poof! at the lower part. my teeth is in a mess, my eyes look tired and my only prized item i had was my fair,acne free skin that does not require any make up. its such a low down. my tired efforts are not giving any positive results. everything remains the same. some people have this problem of getting skinner with out putting effort. let me have that problem even just for a day. |
 040392 SINGAPORE POLYTECNIC CIVIL ENGINEERING AND MANAGEMENT. you can catch me at TWITTER facebook i LOVE my sassy black cat SPOTTY SQUASH is my soon to be forte no cravings for today, maybe just the storm, a mug of hot awesome milk tea and a good teenage romance novel. cbox the sites. FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER!:) MY TWITTER:) nabilahsan qeu suedeena Feeza ayeen sofie azhar Aikhui Eugenia Nur Ayeen Battyguin nieya sharifah farihin dinie aqilah huiyi liyana shermain teeqa iwana-macy iwani-jodie syiqin hayani jia yu zat athirah chiou looi jannah ashraff amir felicia October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 Designer : Chili. Editor : Lastinglove. x o |
